7. Communication In Relationships: Britney's 'Womanizer'

In this entry, I will be discussing communication in relationships and will be referring to Knapp’s Model of Relational Development. For my media text this week, I decided to choose the music video, 'Womanizer' by singer Britney Spears, as I want to look at how relationships are being portrayed in music videos shown on television, online, etc. Plus, I decided to use this music video as a reference, as I thought it would be interesting to analyse an American point of view, in regards to communication in relationships.

Britney Spears first took the world by storm, when she released her debut album in 1999. This single was released to radio stations on September 26, 2008 and the video premiered online only a few hours ago. I also chose this clip, as it does not just revolve around sex, but explores relationships and communication between lovers.

In my opinion, I feel that the relationship between Britney Spears and the male lead (played by Brandon Stoughton), proves that the stages of Knapp’s Model are not linear, and that sometimes, people in relationships might want to take a step back, and as a result, this might cause the relationship to regress to a previous stage or skip a stage.

In reference to the music video, at the beginning; Britney and her boyfriend is featured in a plush New York apartment, which is equipped with a sauna, and we can see her lying down, while her boyfriend is having a shower in the background. In the next scene, we see her serving breakfast to her boyfriend in the kitchen. Thus, this shows that they are in Stage 3 of the "Coming Together" stages, as they are portrayed living together, and this shows a sense of increased commitment, awareness and participation in the relationship. Obviously, they have passed the Initiating and Experimenting stages, as they look pretty comfortable with one another. She is serving him breakfast in her lingerie, while he's checking his schedule for the day. This shows a certain amount of relational identity, disclosure of feelings to the other party; due to their proximity, and physical contact which shows a significant amount of intimacy.

Then, in the next scene, Britney is seen in her boyfriend's office, incognito, perhaps to test and see how far he will go when faced with temptation with the "secretary". He "checks" her out and actively pursues her, thus indicating Stage 1 of the "Coming Together" stages, Initiating, though she rejects his advances and pushes him away while singing, "Boy don't try to front, I know just what you are-are-are".

Her actions are semi-violent, she physically pushes, kicks and slaps him, though ironically, her actions unnervingly motivates him to continue with the chase. Though, this shows a strong sense of differentiation from her side, thus indicating Stage 6 of the "Coming Apart" stages, Differentiating. She pushes his hands away, reaffirming her individuality and refuses to encourage his advances. In the next scene at the bar, she continues to tempt him, though keeping him at a distance. Here, she dances around him, calling him a "Womanizer"and I feel that this reflects her just 'going through the motions of the relationship'. She continues to tease and taunt him, though he revels in it, to her chagrin.

As his driver, she tries to scare him by driving nonchalantly, thus indicating Stage 9 of the "Coming Apart" stages, Avoiding. Here, she seems sure of the outcome of the relationship and tries to give him a hint. In the last scene, she confronts him violently, by shoving him on the bed and kicking him around, until she changes her bedspread, and an empty bed appears, indicating Stage 10 of the "Coming Apart" stages, Terminating.

Thus, I do feel that Knapp’s Model is based on typical behaviours seen in a relationship, and assumptions based on society's interpretation of the motives that drive and define relationships. Not everyone's perception of initiating and experimenting would mirror that described in Knapp’s Model. Some people might initiate or experiment with sex, as opposed to waiting till the intensifying or integrating stage. Others might want to wait till marriage to explore physical intimacy with their partner.

Plus, the “Coming Together” stages are based on society's perception of relationships, that they all lead to marriage or a family. However, not everyone might view their relationship in this manner. Like Britney featured in the video, some might be satisfied with just dating and living with their significant other. In conclusion, the video shows that relationships may regress to a previous stage or skip a stage.

6. Good Examples Of Agenda Pushing: Sexvertising?

The eye wear advertisement featured below for Tom Ford Sunglasses, from the risqué designer Tom Ford; was banned earlier this year by Italy’s advertising watchdogs, the Institute for Advertising Self-Discipline (IAP), for being “vulgar”, “beyond bad taste” and "offending the sensibilities of viewers" and The Italian Advertising Institute (IAA); which labeled it as “sexually implicit”. “[It] goes beyond acceptable limits for advertising aimed at the general public”, says the institute.

However, the Tom Ford perfume advertisements(http://www.mimifroufrou.com/scentedsalamander/2007/08/new_ose_advertising_for_tom_fo.html) used in the United States of America were not censored or banned. (I decided not to feature the American advertisements on my blog, as I did not want to offend anyone or push the buttons too far, however, the link featured above would enlighten you. Viewer discretion is advised).

Generally, Europe is viewed as the continent that exhibits the most liberal attitudes toward sexuality and sexual behavior, and is more tolerant in regards to the display of sexual content in the media and society, while the United States, though liberal in many aspects, was founded on a religious foundation, and is considered more conservative (some use the term prudish or puritanical, recap Janet Jackson's Super Bowl controversy in February 2004) in terms of attitudes towards sex. Thus, I find it ironic that these advertisements were banned in Italy, though published widely in the United States.

However, Italy (where 87.8% of the population identify themselves as Roman Catholic) differentiates itself from other European countries by displaying a mixture of modernity and tradition, all fused into its society and culture. The church (including the Vatican) wields a lot of power socially and to a certain extent; politically, in regards to Italian society. Thus, anything deemed too provocative or risqué could be banned or censored by the Italian authorities. This shows that within their culture, paradoxes exist, as Milan is regarded as the fashion capital of the world, and Italy has also produced the world's best in visual art, literature, music, theatre and architecture, and all these cultural spheres encourage freedom of expression and, to a certain extent, sexuality. Furthermore, Ilona Staller, a former Italian porn-star, who became famous around the world for flashing her breasts in public, was even elected to the Italian parliament in 1987 with 20,000 votes!

In conclusion, culture tells us a lot about who we are, what groups we belong to and how we live our lives. In this case, it dictates where to draw the line, reflects the value system of Italy, as well as influences and interprets behavior. In terms of the continent, European culture is dynamic and multifaceted, as identities tend to overlap. These different identities result in different cultural norms and values across the continent. Thus, stereotyping and assuming similarity would jeopardize intercultural communication. I will end this entry with a quote from Ms. Ilona Staller (former porn-star and member of Italian parliament):

"I am here not showing my breasts. Now, I am speaking about poor people so it is not necessary -- not because I don't have beautiful breasts ... even now. But it's not necessary showing because poor people have no interest in my breasts."

(Staller, once a member of the Italian Parliament, campaigning for the common folk in Hungary in 2002).